The Pot Gets Stirred Some More

Well, it's clearly been a few months since I've posted.

I've been working through some things, on some others and trying to figure out how to navigate through some of my own feelings I'm not so proud of.

In the last several months, we've had a lot of ups and downs, however I'm in a place of wanting to just be away from my step-daughter entirely.  I have watched her grow from a sweet kid to a manipulative, sneaky one and I'm disgusted by her behavior.

Oh I get it, she tries to please her mother, but she has started asking me questions about what I think about a subject even as minuscule as about a pair of earrings.  She then takes what I say back to her mother, twists it to stir up trouble. She's smart enough at seven to take words I actually say, manipulate them into what her mother wants to hear-i.e. shit to make me the wicked step-mother. 


So, I'm currently in a place of zero desire for my step-daughter to even speak to me because I cannot trust her.
Yes, I know she's a child, but this many years later and the legal hoops we've endured, I am fed up.  And you know what she exudes from her face when you ask her WHY she says and does these things???  SATISFACTION.


I'm disgusted right now and figuring out my way to work on my feelings.


Thank God I have found some fellow step-mothers and future step-mothers to talk to and commiserate with!

Stir it Up

It's been a rough week this week.  Which really stinks.

There's been some stirring up of trouble on my step-daughter's part this week, which only makes life hard for everyone --her included.

I don't understand that AT ALL.

It wasn't even anything major, but it's the consistent game of stirring up trouble to cause continuous conflict.

I think part of it is that is the only way of life she knows when she's with her mom, but it has been gone for awhile and recently it has started recurring.  In the past, while she spoke to her mom on the phone while here, we were so hesitant of saying anything outloud that her mom would overhear and then cause more grief for everyone for. For example,  we'd not correct her on something to avoid the drama on the other end of the line.

After living together for 3 1/2 years, my attitude is such that it's irrelevant who you're talking to, if you're incorrect, you will be corrected.   What happens in my house is my responsibility and outsiders don't get a say.

Last night when step-daughter was speaking to her mom, she told her that I made her drink gatorade and  that gave her diarrhea.   I happened to be walking through the room where she was and overheard her say that. I stopped and just said, "You're 6. Not a doctor.  You have gatorade to drink so you don't get dehydrated."

I was pissed.   I guess if I was dealing with a sane mother, it wouldn't be a big deal, but the onslaught of drama that a simple statement like that brings, irritates me. (She'd had a fever, so I was keeping her hydrated and had been sick, hence the diarrhea.)

When she got off the phone we talked about it more and I explained that she's the kid, I'm the grownup and I know what I'm doing as a mother. I told her I don't appreciate her stirring up trouble with her mom and asked her why she was doing that.  Her answer, "I don't know." 

That's my least favorite answer from her EVER.

So, as we head into a new week, I'm hoping this was just a bump and next week will be better. But...

I haven't been so lucky with that hope lately.